Wednesday, May 16, 2007

May 12th, 2007 Recap!



Words from the Commish - “Please accept my apologies on the tardiness of “THE RECAP”. My professional responsibilities have hindered me from completing my league duties in a timely manner. But enough excuses; on with highlights!”

This week was the first week of the new “expanded” playing field. Under the old league, the field was 26 yards wide by 65 yards long (end zone to end zone). The “expanded” field now plays 25 yards wide and 90 yards long (end zone to end zone).

Commish thoughts on the new field:

“Scoring was getting a little out of control, so the League wanted to bring the defense back into Saturday Mornings. This week’s game was a prime example of how the expanded field can help improve the competitiveness of the League. No more one play bombs for touchdowns; this field requires precision of a well groomed offense that can march down the field, picking apart the defense.”

Most Committed Player Award: (Hunter S.) – Would you believe that the only request this player asked from his wife, for his birthday was to come play in the League on Saturday morning. Even on his wife’s birthday, you will still see this player out on the field! There is no “Randy Moss” attitude here; this guy never takes a play or a week off! However, he does need to get a reputable nickname.

NI player of the week: This award goes to Farrellio, although it is not a good award; the NI stands for (Negative Impact). After helping his team go up 2-0, Farrellio single handedly changes his team’s positive mojo by fumbling a touchdown pass on the 10 yard line, which was promptly picked up by “Peg-Leg” Casey Ford. Farrellio’s team would not score again the rest of the day.

“It was like something out of a blooper real! I mean, Leon Lett had his Don Beebe, and Chris Simms his Roy Williams… Farrellio had only himself! How do you just fumble a ball when you have a free walk to the end zone?! Whatever they are paying him, it’s too much! That was just Unfathomable.” (Unnamed SMFL observer).

DD Award: The Defensive Dominator award goes to “Peg-Leg” Casey Ford. With his one good leg, Casey was able to hall in 3 interceptions and a crucial fumble recovery that changed the momentum of the game. Imagine what he could do with one and a half legs!

May 12th MVP: Mike Holland grabs this award for being apart of the most controversial trade in League history! After helping his team to a 5-2 lead, Holland joins the ranks of such un-tradeable players as Wayne Gretzsky, Brett Favre and Hershel Walker, when he was traded away to the losing team. This trade did not pan out for the team that Holland joined, but they were able to fend off the “L” for a few more drives with Holland’s defensive help. Too bad he couldn’t use his emotions of “frustration from the trade” as fuel to will his new team to victory.

Last Stand Award: This past week is Newberry’s last week to play in the league as a bachelor. Now he will be asking permission to play from his wife, the one whom he has chosen to serve the rest of his life. We hope to see Newberry back on the field in a few weeks. The League has lost some great players due to the holiness of marriage. We take a moment and remember those no longer with us on Saturday’s due to this blessed event:
- “Butterfly” Jett Davis
- “Sweet Swingin” Lee McCollum
- “Automatica” Andy Baker
- “Rocket” Ryan Reist***


*** although the “Rocket” did not officially take the vows of marriage, his traveling habits up to Oklahoma each week have forced the League to qualify his absence as that consistent with serving the woman.

When asked if he would return after the honeymoon, Derek boastfully proclaimed:

“Oh yeah I’ll be back out here, my woman understands the importance of football. I know she will let me play, no question. I wear the pants!”

Please note those that have said the same phrase before, they are listed below:


- “Butterfly” Jett Davis
- “Sweet Swingin” Lee McCollum
- “Automatica” Andy Baker
- “Rocket” Ryan Reist***

Good Luck Derek

Best Catch: The game winning catch was provided by none other than the best pass blocker in the league! That’s odd. Tim D., matched up against A-Train, took a post-fly pattern all the way to the house. It was the longest TD pass in the “new field era” of the League’s history (which was one day). Who said the big man can’t take it deep!

Shortest reception: “Sweet feet” Darrell wins this award when he caught a two yard pass from “Peg-Leg” Casey and ran backward seven yards before he was tackled in the end zone. Some might say, he is eerily similar to Barry Sanders… sure he may lose 5 yards here, 7 yards there trying to make something happen, but you never know when he will break those sweet runs all the way to the house! We may dog you this week Darrell, but we’ll be singing your praises next week.

Goal line defender: “A-Train” wins this award for knowing when to hold his man in the end zone and not get caught for it.

“There is no way my guy is going to score! Are you going to let your’s score? I don’t care what you have to do guys; if you’re not cheating you’re not trying!!!”

(That quote taken from the defensive huddle as A-Train tries to encourage his team during a goal line stand)

Hey, as long as the referee’s don’t see it, it never happened! Nice work this week working the system A-Train, it will probably come back ten-fold next week!

League Innovator Award: J-Rad - Although this award has nothing to do with his stellar play on the field, the idea to lengthen the field to improve the defensive side of the game, far outweighs any productivity on the field. The foresight and vision of this young man will help strength the League for years to come.

“We look forward to more new ideas and vision from this young man. It is players like him that keep the League running strong.” (Commish)


Great play this week gents, see all who can make it next time… and remember

-Stay Classy America

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

For the record, I would never demand a trade. Nice touch with the inside look at how Anthony prepares for the big games. Nice ink A-Train!!!